an old woman
forgot her impression
on the cushion of that chair,
her breath fogged
up the window,
left her words as a picture
for us to find.
once she was a mother,
she tells us in the lines
of her face,
in the eyes that look behind
until the rain washes her
away.
now her dreams will be
our blanket
and her memories our
pillow
and with her we will
travel to the sky.
we ride towards
the sun,
wait for flames to form a wall
that melts us back to earth.
as we plummet
we touch the stars so that
they might light our way
when we enter
the deep December sea.
Ariana
I love this poem and it is testament to the fact that you have chosen right in doing poetry as your in-depth. You have a way of describing everything in such a perfect way that I am there in the world of the poem for the time I am reading it. Thank you so much for sharing this with us and I hope to read many more of your poems in the future.
Andrea
Ari, I was quite surprised by this poem. It’s not as rich or commanding as the one you wrote for our poetry unit last year, but equally, though quietly, brilliant. Or perhaps, it just needs your voice to carry it in that fashion. I’m really curious about how it would turn out if you read it versus the dip and vaulting of words in my mind. This poem really reminds me of one of those happy serene songs with harmony cradling a simple melody. And as Andrea says, you have a way of description that paints streaks of colour in my mind. Red for flames, startling white of the stars and an immeasurably deep blue. I also love the topics of your poem. Thanks for sharing something this beautiful ~Clare
Something in this poem
strikes deep
deep
inside of me
of impressions forgotten by others
left on your cushioned chair
left for me to see
for me
to
find beautiful
THANKS! YOUR POEM WAS BEYOND AWESOME!
I loved how quiet and calm it is and I love the rhythm and words because they resemble the quiet lap of the waves on the the shore of a lake.
I’m really glad you’ve chosen to share some of your wicked poetry with the blogging world! As previously discussed, your writing always inspires me to be… more sincere, more poetic 😉 I particularly like the line about the woman leaving her impression on the cushion. You’ve achieved such a nice, gentle flow throughout this piece. Yet, at the same time it is so powerful, so you. After all the stress of making a decision, I believe- in fact I know- you’ve made an awesome choice of In Depth project! Creating truth and beauty like this is a wonderful thing.
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I think your poem was amazing.
Did you do it yourself?
Thanks 🙂 Yes, I wrote it myself.
I love your poetry I loved on our way to the sea that one was the best. At what age did you start to write poetry? Keep up the good work. Keep writing poetry
Lizeth,
Thanks for visiting my blog! I started writing poetry in grade four, but it was really bad. This year, I wanted to get better so I decided to do it as a long-term school project. I have a mentor who is a poet herslef and she gives me advice. I’m really glad that you liked my poem. Do you write poetry? If you have a blog, please leave a link and I will visit it.
~ Ariana